Unique

"There is nothing I need to add to myself to be more worthy of love or kindness.  There is only the undoing of all that gets in the way of it." 

-Chani

 You are one of one.  A limited edition.  Unique in every way possible.  From the color of your hair and eyes, to where you live, how you dress, what talents you have or what talents you lack.   Your thoughts, words, experiences, biases, dreams, everything about you is unique ONLY to you. 

Comparison is the thief of joy.  Comparing yourself to others in any area of your life is, in fact, poison.  How can you compare yourself to others when you are one of a kind?  You will never be like others and others will never be like you.  Yet, we spend most of our lives wishing we were someone different.  Somewhere different.  Wondering why everyone else on the planet seems to have life figured out - who they are, what they want, how to survive no matter what comes their way.  

While we are busy putting our best foot forward, showing up, no matter how unqualified we feel, feeding the delusion that we have it all under control and are thriving, other people are busy doing the EXACT same thing.  Wishing they were someone else, somewhere else, envious of the curated version they see us putting forth and wondering how they came up short in the lottery.   Thinking why can't they be more like us while we are wanting to be more like them.  None of us just being ourselves.

For me, the only way out of making it through every day feeling like I was the only one who was lost, was to come home, pour myself many glasses of wine and agree that I would do better tomorrow.  Tomorrow I could be perfect.  On any given night, I just wanted to drown all my perceived shortcomings and take away the pain of imperfection. 

We are perfect.  Just the way we are.  Even with every bump, bruise, wart, traumatic event, bad decision and missed opportunity.  Yet, if someone came to us tomorrow and told us we had everything we need to be exactly who we were destined to be, would we believe them?  Would we finally be able to live authentically?   Believe in the possibility of what our unique life has to offer?

 "Do not make the mistake of thinking that little old you is not interesting to the world.  You have lived a unique life, consumed a unique suite of ideas, marinated in a unique combination of experiences and hopes and dreams and influences.  You have something no one else has and identifying who and what that is the key to a beautiful life". - Tim Minchin (paraphrased slightly…🥰).

Stop living someone else's life.  Walk into each day with your scars and your victories, your self-loathing and your self-love.  Your uniqueness.  Stop looking externally for who you are.   Listen to YOUR heart.  YOUR soul. And stop drowning your authentic self.  One fact is undeniable, you will never know or understand your uniqueness, the many gifts you bring to this world, if you remain prisoner to the nightly ritual of drowning your dreams and waiting for tomorrow.  Tomorrow will never be a date on the calendar.  Never.  And what a waste for the whole world if we never get to experience the uniqueness of you. 

Much love to you - you one of a kind, beautiful being

Lisa

Lisa Hamil is a founding member and host for The SOS Collective, an online international women’s recovery and support group.  However, this blog and any classes or coaching offered by Lisa Hamil LLC are separate from and not affiliated in any way with The SOS Collective.