Promise

“I am mine before I am ever anyone else’s.”

– Nayyirah Waheed

I made myself a promise at the beginning of this year.  I would write one blog a week. No one is more surprised than I am that I have kept that promise.   And it is almost September. 

There were weeks where I did not feel like writing.  I didn’t know what to say or if what I had to say mattered at all.  Not just to others, but to myself.  Still, I persisted. 

One thing my addiction has taught me, is the importance of keeping promises to myself.  There were many nights where I sat on the couch, glass of wine in hand, believing that because no one was watching, no one would care that I had not kept my promise of sobriety. 

It took me a long time to understand that the ONLY person whose opinion mattered was mine.  That breaking any promise to myself was the thing that made me feel so defeated.  It wasn’t the hangover, it wasn’t the wine, it was the truth that if I could not depend on me, then how would I EVER be able to depend on anyone.  Or grow.  Or trust.

Trust is hard to earn and easy to break.  No one deserves your own trust more than you. 

Tonight is a rainy night, and I am settling in with my cup of tea.  And…. I am at a loss for words.  So, I am keeping my promise that I will post a blog, but it will be short. 

To everyone reading this blog, I want you to know that you matter to me.  To those of you that reach out with your kind words, thank you.  To those of you that I may never hear from or meet, you matter to me every bit as much.  I firmly believe that simply being human is the hardest job any of us will ever have.  Connection, no matter the distance or the medium, is what brings me joy.  Connection is what keeps us human.  Connection is key.   

You matter, always.  In all ways.  You are worthy of all that is good.  And you deserve to have your own heart and your own back.  Never forget your value. 

Have a beautiful week,

Much love,

Lisa

Lisa Hamil is a founding member and host for The SOS Collective, an online international women’s recovery and support group.  However, this blog and any classes or coaching offered by Lisa Hamil LLC are separate from and not affiliated in any way with The SOS Collective.