Repeat After Me...

“Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become.”

—James Clear 

The Winter Olympics begin tomorrow.  There will be 2,900 athletes competing in 116 different events across 16 winter sports.  There are three medals awarded for each event - gold, silver and bronze - 348 total.  Meaning only 12% of all athletes attending will stand on the podium. 

Most research, coaches, and athlete biographies estimate that to even be eligible for a shot at the Olympics requires 10,000 to 15,000 hours of deliberate training.  This roughly translates to 20-30 hours per week, 48-50 weeks per year, for a DECADE or more.  This will vary by sport, but on average, it takes a LOT of time and LOT of dedication to be at the top of their game. 

Of course, this applies to everything we watch as entertainment.  Actors, professional athletes, singers, chefs.  We ohhhh and ahhhhh as they make it look easy.  We watch them stumble and fall and play Monday morning quarterback thinking we would have done it differently.  So easy to judge having never been in the arena.  Often, we ascribe their success to innate talent forgetting that even the most gifted people cannot capitalize on that talent without practice. 

We do not see how many times they are injured and participate anyway.  Nor do we see all their failures or disappointments or bruises.  We do not see the events they miss because they need to be at practice or what other parts of their lives are impacted as they pursue their passion.  We simply witness the outcome of those many hours and either celebrate with them or nonchalantly say, “Maybe next time.”  Not knowing if there will be a next time.  Because none of us can know that…..

It is impossible for me to not compare my efforts of wanting to eat better or exercise more when watching such dedication.  Or even more ambitious and life-altering things like when I chose to quit drinking.  I think about how many times I gave up because I wasn’t seeing the results I expected.  All the starts and stops I had thinking, “I gave it my all and my life does not seem much different, so it must not be working.”  My “all” being two weeks, not a decade.  

It is easy to say that “they” are an athlete.  They have a passion and a purpose and a reason to put in so much effort.  But my health is just as important to me.  I am just as passionate.  So, what is it about me?

Change is not about the goal; it is about the mindset.  It is easy to buy into the myth that gifted athletes have passion and motivation that leads them to persevere.  To act.  When the reality is, action leads to motivation.  We all must start somewhere. 

Acting requires a shift in mindset or, more specifically, a change in identity.  How we see ourselves and how the world relates to us.  Growth is not linear.  It is impossible to start on a new mission today and see results tomorrow.  Growth involves stops and starts.  It is big and small.  It is random and expected.  But most of all, growth is baby steps, not big leaps. 

James Clear states, “Change can take years - before it happens all at once.  Mastery requires patience.”  This is true for us physically.  But this is also true when it comes to our identity.  We can lift all the weights and eat all the healthy foods, but if we still identify as someone who needs sugar (or alcohol) or a day off to soothe the rough spots,  success will be limited.  If we don't address the habits and beliefs that got us “here”, we remain stuck in old habits and beliefs and will never get “there.”  

Identity is built on repetition.  Consistency.  Repeat what brings you joy, what moves you forward, and you become that.  Keep doing what you have always done, while expecting a new outcome, and you will live in frustration.   If we are not willing to adopt the lifestyle necessary to reach our goals, then we need to let the goal go. 

Laura McKowen writes:

“The typical question is, ‘Is this bad enough for me to have to change?’ The question we should be asking is, ‘Is this good enough for me to stay the same?’ And the real question underneath it all is, ‘Am I free?’”

We get to choose.  Everything we have ever done, we chose.  We choose to remain addicted, and we choose to get sober.  We choose to stay married; we choose to get divorced.  We choose to watch, we choose to participate.  Even when we feel like we do not have a choice, we are still choosing.  Choosing to do nothing is a choice. Once we make a choice, we then must develop habits and routines and rituals that support our choice.  And we must repeat them over and over and over until they become part of our new identity. 

If we want true freedom, we must stop thinking, “What if?” and act on what it would take to answer that question.  And we must do it for more than a few weeks or even a few years.  We must decide what freedom looks like to us and then be consistent and determined in our effort to get there.  Knowing that there will be productive days and days where we want to stay in bed.  But if we get up more days than we allow ourselves to be down, we will make progress. 

While only 12% of the athletes that go to the Olympics will get a medal, I would be hard-pressed to call any one of them a failure.  The only failure would have been choosing to never even try.

So…. want something in your life to change?  Start.  And then start again.  And repeat over and over and over.  And over again. 

“Am I free?” Will I achieve my “what ifs?” Only you have the answer.

Much love,

Lisa

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Lisa Hamil is a founding member and host for The SOS Collective, an online international women’s recovery and support group.  However, this blog and any classes or coaching offered by Lisa Hamil LLC are separate from and not affiliated in any way with The SOS Collective.