Bracing For The New Year

"Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can,"  

Arthur Ashe

Happy New Year and welcome to 2026!  A new year and a new you.  At least that is what I promise myself every year.  And yet, what is the difference between December 31^st and January 1^st except 24 hours? I know I will not magically wake up a new person simply because it is a new year, but that doesn’t stop me from dreaming about it. 

The New Year is less about the number on the calendar and more about humanity’s ancient need to mark time, make meaning, and create psychological thresholds. Across history and cultures, it has functioned as a ritualized pause.  A moment to look back, let go, and imagine what might come next.  We are meaning-making creatures living inside time.  But time is invisible. So, we create markers.

The New Year gives us a container for reflection, a threshold between “what was” and “what could be” and permission to pause without guilt.  In many ways it functions like a comma in the sentence of our lives.  Not the start of a new book, but a place to breathe. A new chapter to consider. 

A friend of mine said yesterday that she was “bracing” for the new year.  I find that such an unusual word to describe what I may plan for this year, but it resonated with me.  Many of the things on my “to do” list for this year mirror what I was dreaming about last year.  Bracing is an apt description of the expectations for my 2026 dreams.  A subtle undercurrent saying, “Never mind last year, you had too many things that interfered with your goal.  This year will be different.”  Even though I know in my heart it won’t be that different at all.  A passive aggressive permission to disappoint myself again. 

Like every other “holiday”, the New Year is a marketer’s dream.  No end of products, classes and ideas that will help you become the best version of yourself.  All you have to do is line someone else’s pockets and they will gladly send you their quick fix.  Because I “failed” last year, I am more likely to pay the price for someone else to tell me how to live my life.  While all the while bracing myself for failure. 

Here’s where modern culture distorts the ritual.

We’ve turned the New Year into a magical reset button, expecting transformation without integration. Why do we fall for it every year?  Temporal landmarks (like January 1) do increase motivation.  This is known as the fresh start effect.  But motivation without identity work, grief, or honesty collapses quickly.  We mistake symbolic change like the turnover of the calendar for structural change.   But core change such as new habits, boundaries, or beliefs will never be something that we can change overnight or with a “quick fix”.

When January 15 arrives and nothing feels different, rather than questioning the fantasy, we assume we failed. 

The New Year was never meant to make you someone else.  It was meant to open a few different questions for review.  What is ready to be released? What wants to be carried forward with more care?  What truth have I been postponing?

Transformation doesn’t happen because the calendar changes.  It happens when attention, compassion, and courage change.  When we “brace” ourselves for what is to come, we are positioning the outlook for war.  Our ego vs our heart. Already afraid that we will be unable to transform into the vision we can see so clearly but haven’t formed a true path for how to get there. 

My friend quickly reframed her 2026 into “embracing” what might come.  Such a simple but POWERFUL perspective shift.  One from fear of failure to acceptance.  Knowing that no matter what comes, whether you succeed or fail, you will embrace the effort. You will learn something about yourself along the way and be encouraged to take the next small step.   Resolutions that are focused internally on ways to embrace life not brace for it, are much more likely to stick.  But they take time and effort and daily practice. 

The New Year is not a demand.

It is an invitation.

And invitations can, and should, be accepted slowly.  So here is to 2026 and all you dream for yourself.  But this year, Arthur Ashe has it correct, start where you are, use what you have, do what you can and embrace the process. 

Much love,

Lisa

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Lisa Hamil is a founding member and host for The SOS Collective, an online international women’s recovery and support group.  However, this blog and any classes or coaching offered by Lisa Hamil LLC are separate from and not affiliated in any way with The SOS Collective.